Kitty Crack

Friskies Crispies aka Cheesy Poofs are kitty crack.   Marley has been at it again.  This is the 2nd time she has gotten onto the cupboard, grabbed a bag of poofs and chewed the bottom of the bag off to get into it.  The first time, she did it to 2 bags at once, and ate 1/2 the bags and then puked.  This time she apparently had more self control and only did 1 bag.  If she even hears me move the bag, she comes running.  She knows the words "cheesy poofs" and goes nuts when I say it.  She inhales them, I don't even think she chews them.  She is such a sweet kitty, but she will do almost anything to score.  Are these things even street legal? She will carry the bags around in her mouth all over the house.  I often hear this scratching noise coming out of her box or basket, and surprise, surprise, it's Marley trying to open the bag of poofs herself.  I think she thinks I won't notice.  Is it bad that I continue to feed her habit (pun intended)  She especially likes the cheese or the milk ones, but she isn't picky, the chicken or salmon flavors are good too.  What do they put in these things?  I swear to god they have some addictive substance in them.  There is no place safe to keep them; she knows all my hiding places.  Well, off to go find a new place to put her stash!

circa aug 2007

FROM AUGUST 2007

Ok, so today was Homecoming.  Not of the football variety, tho.  It's basically when all the class reunions happen, and there's a big ass parade, street vendors, bands, etc all day down town, and fireworks.  Our town doesn't have fireworks for any other holiday; it saves all the $ for Homecoming.  I spent the day with Lolly and the kids.  I had a really good time but got one hell of a sunburn.  (and more tiny freckles on my shoulders.  if you've been keeping up with me, you would know that my special guy will needs to think they are cute, so, just more cuteness for me! lol)

The coolest thing about today was not seeing M in town, not getting a dough boy, not even that the drummer of one of the bands looks kinda like J and got my motor running.  It was that I got a good chance to enjoy the Goddess tonight.  Lolly was running late for picking me up for the fireworks cuz Miss Sadie is sick.  So I decided that I would go to the end of my driveway and see them from there.  The breeze wrapped around me, cooling and soothing my sunburned skin.  It has been so unbearably hot and humid these last 2 weeks, and it's just draining everything out of me so it seemed particularly beautiful.  The stars are out in full force; I saw one of the Dippers, (I think the Big one, but I don't know much about stars...yet) The grass was refreshingly cool sit on.  I just sat there on the grass, and just really enjoyed our Earth for a while.  It was also a great place for viewing the fireworks.  Although I was joined after a while by one of my neighbors and 3 of her friends, I had such a great time.  The fireworks were so pretty.  The finale was the best finale I have ever seen.  Just simply gorgeous.  After awhile, my allergies kicked in and I started coughing and itching all over.  The moment was shattered.  But moments like this are so special.  They are what life is really all about.  Like beautiful beads, I plan on stringing these moments into a necklace to wear around my soul.

WHAT I LEARNED IN 2006 (A RECYCLED BLOG)

ok, so I used to blog on Myspace, and some of them were pretty funny, so I decided to put them up here for your reading enjoyment!

Things I learned in 2006

1) Never fuck a man with the same name as your mother
2) 2 words: PLATE TECTONICS
3) you can choose to find the best in everyone, but in the end they all turn out to be crazy as shit house rats
4) Jagermeister is yucky
5) people really do like and care about me
6) I don't really suck as bad as I think I do
7) ketchup is not a sex toy
8) Who my real friends are
9) never let a drunk person cut your hair
10) how to be a goddess
11) don't count 100% on the 'baby test' on choosing a man to be with (if the baby likes him, he must be good, right???)
12) what it feels like to (almost) get (almost) what you want
13) that my mom really does care
14) that I won't burn in hell for saying "FUCK" and listening to AC/DC
15) if someone leaves you when you need them most, they were never really yours in the first place
16) how to make an Excel spreadsheet
17) Dating one alcoholic is not much different from being married to another alcoholic; same shit, different guy
18) what it's like for once to be wanted because I am a good person not just a good fuck, and then to screw it up because all i wanted was to fuck
19) I really am stronger than I think I am
20) I've got it going on enough to pick up a hottie IN MY PAJAMAS
(go me, go me)
21) What it's like to be with a "bad boy"
22) Wrap your Stump before You Hump
23) no where is ever really safe
24) Sweet Cinnamon Pumpkin stuff from Bath and Body Works drives men crazy
25) how to be a player and to be played
26) men who are hurting tend to hurt others
27) some things (and people) never change
28) I CAN go places alone
29) Maybe I'm not as ready for a relationship as I thought I was
30) I was made in the image of the Goddess, and I am lovely in her sight
31) how to read Tarot cards
32) What it feels like to be treated well by a man
33) I am more than just a good fuck
34) I deserve to be treated well
35) It doesn't matter how many spells you do, if it is going to harm you, it won't work
36) that iPods ROCK
37) My Name is Earl is a really good show
38) When it comes to penises, it's either feast or famine
39) Sometimes when you play, you gotta pay
40) It is NOT ok to be hurt even if the guy stays with you
41) Movies that are not rated are better than Cinemax after 10PM
42) What an emo kid is
43) That I want to fuck Ami from Miami Ink
44) Just cuz a man hangs his coat up in the closet and puts his own clothes away does not mean he wont fuck you over or fuck you up
45) Spinach does taste good
46) What your mom tells you is really true: people pick on others because they are jealous
47) My favorite saying of 2006: "go fuck yaself"
48) How to milk a man- altho my attempt was unsuccessful
49) that being a witch/pagan ROCKS
50) the power of being a woman
51) Being pagan and believing in Jesus is not mutually exclusive
52) the power and peace of meditation
53) You shouldn't sleep with someone just because you feel obligated
54) what it's like to be on the leaving end of a one night stand (god, that's uncomfortable!! you men make it look so easy!)
55) Sometime, when I wasn't looking, I grew up... a lot 

Goddess of the Month for July- Vesta

Vesta, or Mistress Vesta, as I call her is the Goddess I chose for July.  I'm late in posting this, since in 2 days it will be August, but I hope you enjoy and find this useful!

VESTA’S MEAL

To ensure fortune, health and happiness for your family, honor Vesta by making a hearty, home cooked meal.  Pick comfort foods that everyone can enjoy.  Sit some bread, a small dish of water and a few pinches of salt in the middle of the dinner table as an offering to Vesta and light a white candle to represent her fire and say the following blessing:

“Wherever a home is tended

Vesta makes a sanctuary 

Preserve our home and family

In love, health and safety.”

A PRAYER TO VESTA

Vesta, bless this hearth and home

Bring health to our bellies and strength to our bones

Bless those whose arms are empty and long for a baby

To nourish and bring up in love and to honor the goddess

In her many faces

Bless those who hunger and guide our hands to serve them

Bless us all with love and peace

And help us to remember you in all fires and flames.

From orderofthewhitemoon.org

VESTA

Colors:  orange, brown

Sabbats:  Imbolc, Lammas, Mabon

Festivals: Vestalia (June 7-15), March 1 (old New Years Day)

Animal:  Ass

     Vesta, not to be confused with Hestia, who, although similar, are 2 distinct deities, is the Roman goddess of the hearth, home, and the sacred flame.  She was always invoked last during ceremonies.  She was the last  and ultimately only Roman deity who was served by an all female priesthood (the Vestal Virgins).  Her temple was round.  She was so sacred to the Romans that her traditions could never be changed, even when certain things fell out of fashion.
     Vestal Virgins were honored above other women; they had more legal and economic privileges than ordinary Roman women.  It was an honor to be chosen for this service.  A Vestal served for 30 years: 10 years learning the Mysteries of Vesta, 10 in service to the Goddess, and 10 training their replacements.  While serving the Goddess, Vestals were sworn to stay virginal, but after they retired from service they were free to marry.  Breaking her vows was a serious offence.  Their primary role was to make sure the sacred flame of Rome never went out, and if it did, the priestesses were punished.  They also made the mola salsa which were ritual salt cakes that were offered to Vesta as a sacrifice, sprinkled over other animals who were to be sacrificed to other gods and used to purify space.
     Vesta is also honored in the home.  She is present in any flame (even though most don’t cook on fire stoves anymore, she is also found in an oven’s pilot light)  Any offerings to her should be set directly on a flame.  Since she is an oracular goddess as well as of the flame, she can give you information via flame gazing.

Goddess of the Month Club- Aine








AINE





ATTRIBUTES: LOVE FERTILITY

DESIRE PROTECTING HUMANS FROM ILLNESS

AGRICULTURE ANIMALS COMPASSION FLOWERS

GREIF/SADNESS LIGHT ATTRACTING LOVE

UNCONDITIONAL LOVE SOLAR MAGICK

Magical arts pleasure poetry healing from rape

Retribution the sun



Color: red green purple silver



Element: water fire



Wheel of the year: Beltane litha



Animal: horse cow



Planet: the sun direction: south







Aine (pronounced “awn-ya) is the Irish goddess of love, desire and fertility, and protects humans from illnesses. She is a beautiful queen of the fairies as well. She was a powerful goddess, much loved in Ireland. She is said to live in a castle at cnoc aine, near munster’s lough gur. She has been known to manifest as a red mare, or a beautiful woman to seduce human men. She can also be in the form of an old woman.

IT IS SAID THAT CHRISTIAN MONKS MADE HER INTO A FAIRY RATHER THAN A GODDESS BECAUSE ALTHOUGH THEY DISAPPROVED OF HER SEXUALITY AND WORSHIP, THEY COULDN’T GET RID OF HER. SHE WAS SAID TO SEDUCE MORTAL MEN AND GIVE BIRTH TO FAIRIES. MOST OF THE MEN SHE SEDUCED DIED; THIS IS POSSIBLY SOMETHING THE MONKS STARTED TO ENCOURAGE MONOGOMY RATHER THAN AINE’S FREE LOVE.

She can bestow on you a gift for writing poetry, but if you displease her in this, or in anything, she can take the gift back and leave you with madness.

The summer solstice is her day. People light torches and waved over crops and cattle. In this aspect, she is believed to have gifted the human race with grain.

Although she is a sun goddess, she is also seen as a moon goddess. In her dark maiden aspect, she defends scorn lovers and seeks revenge on those she feels are unsuitable mates.

In her stories, she is said to have been raped by a human whom she then turned into a goose. Others say that she killed her rapist. She is therefore a great goddess to turn to for healing for rapes and sexual assaults.



Messages from aine:



“magic is afoot. Find a way to encourage it.” (from goddess inspiration oracle cards)



“take a risk, and put your hearts desire into action.’ (FROM GODDESS GUIDANCE ORACLE CARDS)



A PRAYER TO AINE



YOU WHO ARE AS BRIGHT AS THE SUN

AND AS GLOWING AS THE MOON

THANK YOU FOR THE JOY YOU GIVE TO US

YOUR CHILDREN.

PLEASE BLESS US THIS SOLSTICE,

BESTOW UPON US YOUR JOY, LOVE AND FERTILITY.

WITH YOUR WINGS, YOU SOAR OVER US

SHOWERING US WITH YOUR LOVE AND LIGHT.

WE HONOR YOU WITH FIRE AND LAUGHTER

FEASTING AND REMEMBERING

FOR WITHOUT YOU

OUR BODIES AND OUR SOULS WOULD NOT

BE NOURISHED.

BLESSED BE TO YOU,

QUEEN OF THE FAE.



(AN AMY ORIGINAL)

Change

Change...

I realized something a week or 2 ago while in my session with my spiritual counselor.  In my way of looking at things, change equals the end; a severing, never to be again.  This is why I am so afraid of change.  But that is not what change is.  Change is an evolving, a flowing of things to where they need to be and are supposed to be. 
Being with Zeus makes me happy; but I don't let myself be.  I'm always so afraid that this will be the last time we will ever be together, tomorrow I could never see him again, he'll leave and this time he won't come back.  In my quest of "healing Hera" (which really should be the name of this blog, and will probably be the title of my book I will write someday) I knew something had to change in our relationship, but I thought changing would mean I would have to sever all ties with him, never see him again, don't answer his phone calls.  No wonder I have been so scared and reluctant to do it!
With my new epiphany, I see that if I just go with the flow, and let our relationship evolve, then it will end up where it needs to be, we can still be "together", and I can just relax and enjoy the ride to somewhere in the middle. : ) 
Things seem to be more relaxed with us now.  I am more relaxed with us now.  I'm trying to bring the focus back to me; my blood sugars have gone up again, so I know that my body is telling me to focus on myself and everyone else will be ok.  I've started FLY Lady's system of housekeeping.  (Well, today is basically day 1, but at least I've started! lol)  I'm going to be writing more, to get into the habit of it.  I have seen a glimpse of my future, and I am going to be writing a book about my journey.  If I don't journal or blog, how am I going to remember all this stuff? 
Well, that's it for now.  Totally not what I planned on blogging about, but, it's what's in me at the moment.  Blessed Harvest Moon everyone!

get it together

I really need to get it together.  I mean, I've been doing loads of "higher stuff" - spirit work, getting Shamballah healings, working on balancing my yin and yang...  but I've kinda gotten into a funk.  I feel like I spend all day zombie-ing out to Facebook games.  I've been out of work for a good while now; I thought I would have had it all going on by now.  I haven't been writing, I have barely been reading, my shit is still not quite organized, it seems like house work just piles up on me.  I'm get overwhelmed very easily, and most days I'm on overload and even the tiniest things send me over the edge. 

But I have seen a glimpse of my future; I will write a book about my life.  All the struggles, mistakes, lessons learned, joys, gifts and insights that make up my journey. 

So I told myself I needed to start writing every day.  Blogging, journaling, whatever, I just need to do it.  My throat chakra has been cloudy; I have something to say.  But I feel like I never stop talking.  So I hope y'all don't mind hearing from me a little more often.  And if any of you happen to play Gardens of Time on Facebook... :D